YOUR CHILD CANNOT POSSIBLY REPLICATE THESE JUNYA WATANABE SELVEDGE DENIM PATCH JEANS

​Images via Goodhood

Patchwork stuff is in right now, which is great news for all you college professors and your tweed sport coats. These Junya Watanabe selvedge denim patch jeans sell for about 602 USD and I bet you're all like "602 dollars? My kid could sew these and he had to repeat the third grade", but slow down, kemosabe. Do you really believe you or your ADD-addled progeny have the arts and crafts skills to challenge Junya tha gawd? If I sit you down with some scissors and a pair of Levi's, how long until Goodhood stocks your shit? How long until you have your own line with Comme des Garçons? How long until you admit you're just a rhetorical device I'm using as a strawman for some people's lazy, anti-fashion opinions? I'm sorry, dear reader, that was unfair of me. You are so much more than a rhetorical device. You are a real person, with real feelings. Unless you're one of those Instagram spambots. Then you're definitely not a real person, Keily_o_69, and I don't need your filthy followers, thankyouverymuch.