TIM COPPENS MA-1 BACKPACKS, DOPE HONORIFICS & ATTEMPTED PUNS

​Images via UNION

This is the MA-1 Backpack from Tim Coppens and I recommend you go "coppens" it immediately. That was supposed to be a pun. Did you laugh? No? Not even the meagerest chuckle or chortle? I guess that was to be expected, puns being one of the lowest forms of humor, lower even than sarcasm or the films of Dane Cook. Doesn't this backpack look like a gas mask? Kind of does, right? Don't answer if you disagree. Your voice does not need to be heard. This blog ain't no democracy; it's a theocracy and I'm God and the President. Or the Prime Minister. I haven't worked that part out yet. Maybe I'll give myself an extra dope honorific, like High Chancellor or Viceroy. Nobody fucks with the Viceroy. Unless it's the Trade Federation Viceroy from the Star Wars prequels: practically anybody can fuck with him. What a dick that guy is. Weirdly racist too. Not in a burning-cross-on-the-lawn kind of way, but more of a blackface-on-Halloween kind of way -- undoubtedly ignorant, but not necessarily malicious or hateful. George Lucas should put that phrase on his tombstone. I'll even let him use it for free. Light bulb moment: let's remake the prequels with Dane Cook in all the lead roles, Eddie Murphy style. I meant that to be funny, but I realize now that it's simply terrifying. Delete that image from your mind. Or at least try to. I apologize for nothing -RB