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These are the Lunar Force 1 Duckboots from Nike Sportswear, the footwear brand's "high-end lifestyle collection", and they solve that age old problem of being unable to wear expensive sneakers in foul weather. More like fowl weather, because they're duckboots, am I right? I'm sorry. Now is not the time for silly puns; we need to focus on the matter at hand. More like the matter at foot though, right? Because we're discussing shoes. I'm so sorry. Focus on the boots. I'm over the moon about these Lunar -- goddammit. I need to join a support group for pun abusers. I'm willing to acknowledge that such a thing almost certainly does not exist, but I am wholly unwilling to let the idea go until I've wrung about a hundred additional words out of the topic. What kind of snacks would they serve at the meetings? Would they just contract out to a food truck called "Play on Curds"? Would eight of the twelve steps be abstaining from puns and all related figurative language? What would the other four steps be? I assume one of them would be making amends with the people you've hurt or otherwise wronged with your puns. Is there any way to skip that one? I don't enjoy apologizing, nor do I enjoy admitting fault, so that step really doesn't work for me. Hold on, I feel like we rushed past "Play on Curds" and that's not okay. That's my fucking food truck name and I will sue the shit out of you if you try to take it. I'm not a litigious man by nature, but I don't play games with trademarks -RB
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