NEIGHBORHOOD VESTS FOR OUR NEW UTOPIA

Images via Idol Brooklyn

Let's get this out of the way: wearing a vest is a high-risk sartorial maneuver. A misplaced vest can render even otherwise immaculate outfits instantly swagless, precipitating an irrevocable slide into douchedom. Believe me: I’ve been there. There are pictures and they are extremely humiliating. All that being said, I really want this Padded Vest from Neighborhood. This vest is supernaturally good. This vest is the light and the truth. This vest is the savior, sent by the fashion gods (unsurprisingly from Japan) to redeem us from all our vest-related sins, past, present, and future. Eat of this cotton, for it is my body. Drink of this indigo, for it is my blood. Together we are a revolution. Go start a fire. Fuck it, start a bunch of fires. We will watch this world burn, then raise up a new society from the smoldering ashes. A utopia, where everyone is equal, where there is no evil, no fear, no pain. And everyone wears vests too, because that’s how this whole movement got started and we can never forget that. If we don’t honor our past, then we’re no better than the non-vest-wearers. We should come up with a secret handshake. I’m kind of serious about that part ​-RB