Images via Fuga Fashion
Ayo fam, check this “SENSITIVE” Sweatshirt (available in black, blue, and khaki) from streetwear brand Fuga Fashion and get ready to hit the “Buy with PayPal” button like it insulted your mom or complimented the president. As the blurb on the Fuga Fashion store page says of this sweatshirt, “We guarantee your friends don't have this yet”, so cop one and refuse to tell your envious buddies and colleagues where you got it, until they bow down and worship you as the one true jawnz gawd. Set the trends. Make the tastes. Become the #influencer you were always meant to be. Recruit an over the hill rapper and launch a music festival. Scam your investors and bilk them out of thousands of their hard earned dollars. To be fair, I don’t know if all their dollars are hard earned. Seems like there could be some Daddy’s and/or Mommy’s money type shit going on with some of them. I mean, if you’re willing to part with tens of racks just to be part of some dumbass Coachella knockoff, you’re probably not Warren Buffett. The notable downside to this plan is the lack of sartorial variety allowed in prison, which is where you’ll more than likely end up if you follow my advice. I admittedly do not have your best interest at heart and bear you no fiduciary duty whatsoever. Do I look like I work for T. Rowe Price, bruh? You can’t see me right now, but, trust me, I don’t. I’m wearing a pink camp shirt and a backwards strapback right now. I’m dressed like a Silver Lake hipster daytripping it on the Venice boardwalk or the newest brand ambassador for some kitschy cool craft cocktail in a can company. I’m bout to cop some some ill jawnery from Fuga Fashion and start dressing like I listen to a lot of Scarlxrd, because I listen to a lot of Scarlxrd. That’s called truth in advertising, folks, and I’m pretty sure that was the point of this entire post. Or pxst. Shout to Scarlxrd -RB
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